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Post by kate on May 22, 2007 21:25:22 GMT 10
Hi
Have you thought about how many visits per year you would like for your child to have with their birth family?
Will you have the birth family at your house, or a 'neutral' location?
How do you invisage these visits happening?
Cheers,
Kate
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Post by Kim on Jun 4, 2007 16:13:01 GMT 10
Hi Have you thought about how many visits per year you would like for your child to have with their birth family? Will you have the birth family at your house, or a 'neutral' location? How do you invisage these visits happening? Cheers, Kate Hi Kate, again I am sorry for not seeing this post sooner. Also again this question is one of the 164 questions adoptive parents get asked. Personally my husband and I want to do what is right for the birth family and the child, so we are happy to have from 0 to 6 visits a year with the birth family. Which of course is a visit ever 2 months. I do know most people I've talked to, both adoptive parents and birth parents, seem to prefer no more than 4 visits a year as many who tried 6 visits said they found it too much, even birth families found it too much. As for having the visits in your home or a neutral place, I know that at the start the visits are always in a neutral place, but after a while when you have gotten to know each other and feel comfortable with each other you are able to have them at your house if you want to. I think it will be hard for people who havent yet become adoptive parents to answer some questions for sure, as you can answer now but the situation may change when you are actually in it. You and the birth family may be friendly towards each other or you may not really be able to get on after a while of getting to know each other. This is also the same as with your question regarding how people invision the visits going, most adoptive parents I've spoken to who havent yet adopted always hope and imagine that the visits are going to go really well and that they will get along with the birth family for ever, yet this isnt always the case. I know I would really love for us and the birth family of our child to get along really well, so that we would feel comfortable inviting them to our house, but this is something we wont be able to know until it happens.
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