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Post by cat01 on Sept 28, 2013 13:10:27 GMT 10
Hi all, I was so relieved to find this forum. We are only in the very early stages of looking at adoption so I hope it is ok that I have joined. I am 30 and my DP is 34. We have been together for almost 8 years and after 5 to 6 years of TTC, countless procedures and failed IVF, we both feel it is time to move on and close that chapter of our lives. We are still in the waiting period for our 6 months to be up before we can look at attending any of the training sessions but am just wanting to try and learn as much I can in the mean time. I have made a few enquiries through our local agency in regional Victoria and it has been difficult to even get someone to refer me to attend one of the information sessions in Melbourne. I am still not sure if they will let us attend this information session before the official 6 month period has passed. If anyone has any advice on what I could be doing, books I should be reading or just any tips while are waiting to be able to start the process that would be fantastic. Thanking you and I look forward to getting to know you all through the forum Cat
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Kay
Toddler
Mama through local adoption :)
Posts: 230
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Post by Kay on Sept 29, 2013 14:23:19 GMT 10
Hi Cat, Welcome to the forum. I can certainly say that from my experience the girls on here have been a great source of support and information. Having said that we are quite a small community and sometimes it might take a few days to get an answer. It sounds like we have very similar stories but it took living overseas for a year for me to come to the conclusion that IVF was not the right place for us. From what I remember (I did education 4 years ago) you can attend information sessions but just cant apply until the 6 months is up. Most agencies will only do one session per year but you can attend any session if you are willing to travel. As far as agencies go, you can either go through your local DHS service or Catholic Care who offer a statewide service. I would recommend talking to both and judging who you are comfortable with. It is really important that you feel comfortable through the whole process. I havent found many books around the place and there aren't even many forums. I think this is because adoption is not common in Australia. Please ask any questions - we will all be here for you and welcome to the forum. Kay
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Post by goggly on Sept 29, 2013 16:08:43 GMT 10
Hi Cat, welcome. Firstly it depends on which agency you are with as to how well you will go getting any answers, but persistence is the key! You may also want to think about permanent care as well, even if you decide at a later date it is not for you, its easier to do all education at the start (and saves having to go back when you are usually thoroughly over it).
From memory you can go to education groups and get information before the six months is up, they just won't start interviews (unlikely anyway, nothing moves fast). I would be really pleasant but firm if you want to go to education groups, considering it may take a few months to get into one, and then another few to put your paperwork in and then at least another few to be allocated a social worker, you could be looking at at least year before you even talk to a SW.
Apparently allocations this year have been really slow for both LA and PC but towards the end of last year there were heaps. We were early 30s when allocated with DD and from the moment I saw her I was so pleased that we were unable to have a bio child and glad all assisted conception didn't work (although I wish I still had the money we spent on it!)
If you have any specifics you want to discuss, feel free to PM me.
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Post by cat01 on Oct 1, 2013 18:13:56 GMT 10
Thank you Kay and goggly for the replies and advice. We are still waiting to hear back about the information sessions and will give it a bit longer before I start harassing them too much. I have been doing a bit of reading on the internet on different forums and I hadn't really given much thought about the whole process and how much information they are going to want to know. It has been a real eye opener reading through others posts. I then started thinking about it all and started looking at our family tree and well it looks very messy on both sides. Apart from our immediate families, it is full of divorce, separation and deaths. I hadn't really considered how that might impact on adoption but now I'm starting to worry that perhaps we may not look like the best candidates. And that's without them even picking through our thoughts and emotions. Ah well not much I can do but focus on making sure we are both healthy and in a good frame of mind going into this. I know it is going to be a long drawn out process.
Thanks again
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Post by goggly on Oct 1, 2013 18:53:51 GMT 10
Cat don't worry about the family tree, mine two two full A3 pages as DH's dad has been married three times! The best thing you can do is worry about each step as it comes up, break it down into tasks and work through it. Yes there is a lot of information, but at the end of the day, you have access to it all, its just a bit of effort to collate but so worth it!
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Kay
Toddler
Mama through local adoption :)
Posts: 230
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Post by Kay on Oct 1, 2013 19:54:19 GMT 10
Cat
There is no sense in worrying about the family tree, it is such a small part of the application and interviews and if the agency are concerned they will ask questions and you can explain things. I think from my experience they are more interested in how it has shaped you.
Kay
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Post by cat01 on Oct 25, 2013 11:30:55 GMT 10
You are right. I am getting way ahead of myself. So there is still no news on how long it may be for us to attend an information session. I have been told that there is a long waiting list and there is only one more being run this year. They haven't released the timetable for next year either but our local agency said it would even be unlikely for us to get into the first sessions of next year (which would probably be in March). So it looks like we could be in for a very very very long wait. This is a bit disappointing but I guess this is just something you have to get used to with this path. Trying not to think about it all at the moment. Hope everyone else is well. Cat
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Post by fostercarer on Apr 24, 2014 19:21:50 GMT 10
Based on my experience, ring around and find out when all of the information sessions are on, and then go to the first one available. I went to one that I was morph zoned for to do my permanent care information and also for my training. Don't wait for them to call you.
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