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Post by flossyinoz on Feb 11, 2009 14:52:00 GMT 10
Now you guys may know all about baby care and options of getting help and advice in your community - I don't. In a way birthmothers have it a lot easier, they know up to 9 months in advance that the bub is coming and doctors and hospitals bring them in contact with all the services they may need. In our case, may this be adoption or pc all will happen pretty fast if it happens. Of course you can say now we had a lot more time to prepare than 9 months, yes we had, but the problem is we do not know the "delivery date" and unlike natural births this may vary not by weeks but by years . So what to do to get information, learn about baby care without doing a course and then forgetting all about it as the whole thing may be months and years down the track. Also the feeling to sit together with all these happy mums in a course who are raving about their darlings and we don't even have one yet. and reading books about baby/toddler care is fine but not quite the real thing. Has anybody contacted their maternal health centre or hospital or are you all waiting until you have you child. Just thought it might be a bit late when the bub is in my hands (don't they come with a manual ?) Or does DHS help in giving practical advice? What is the best thing to do? Opinions, strategies??? Flossyinoz
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Post by doris on Feb 11, 2009 16:05:39 GMT 10
Hi Flossy
I did none of that, because we did not know what age our child was going to be. I know with PC the child has already been to a maternal health nurse. We have chosen to stay with the original nurse because she knows all about our child. But you can choose to go to a centre near you. The best place to go is your local council, they have all the information you need regarding the location and if there are any courses.
Doris
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Post by goggly on Feb 11, 2009 18:46:13 GMT 10
A lot of the information we got was at handover from DD's foster parents helpful tips about what our baby liked etc. The SW is probably not going to be that much use to you on the day-to-day stuff and even when we came home I still called my DD foster mum if I had a question.
I also have masses of family and friends who have small children so I really utilised their advice when I needed it and pretended I didn't hear it when I didn't want to follow it.
First maternal health visit I explained the situation and the nurse was fantastic. She was also looking for other stuff that birth mums might not worry about like attachment issues etc and offered some great support and advice.
Considering that you don't know the age of the child, it might be hard to hook into anything before you are placed. Don't worry, surprisingly you will know what to do, even if it is not always the thing you thought you would do in that situation!
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Post by waiting on Sept 29, 2009 8:44:49 GMT 10
Hi Girls, I know this is late but I have been thinking of this too. I have just decided to take it one day at a time, then when I need something I will go to the phone book or internet and google a maternal nurse. What I did do before, was look at things like cots and prams, to at least know what sort of things we wanted. F
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Post by flossyinoz on Sept 29, 2009 10:30:06 GMT 10
Waiting, I have meanwhile resorted to the same strategy, I ahve looked around what I think I will need and like, so I am prepared when it has to be quick. But there are always little stuffed animals or other things which all go into a sideboard in case they will be needed for a child later. I am glad we did not have a nursery prepared because our social workers would have seen that as only focussing on a child and not living our lives. But we are doing parenting courses (not hands on but about guiding children etc) which is somethting our agency strongly encourages and sees as initiative. so you have to keep the balance between going totally overboard and being prepared. Cheers
Flossyinoz
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